I Drew The Line at Fish Sperm...

I’ve been touring the planet this week, pleased to report it all seems to be there; at least the Northern half, I’ll infer that the rest of it is down there.   Big it is too.  You may hear that the world is getting smaller.  I have a simple response to that.  Bollocks.  The planet is fecking enormous, something you start to realise when you try and fly around the damn thing at under 1000kph.

( More here... btw - Randy, you can have this... )

Frequently Flying...

I’ve just been upgraded.  I write this in seat 1K on a Cathy Pacific A340-300 somewhere over China.  This is my very first time in a Long Haul First Class seat, and I’ll confess I’m behaving like a little kid. (Seat goes up, seat goes down, ohh… pyjamas!  Ohh…  really really good booze list…)

I’ve been travelling Business Class on this trip, which is rare, because the cost of the Round the World ticket was significantly less than a single return business class fare to one of my destinations and less than individual Economy Class trips.  Apparently RTW Business Class Fares are one of the few remaining deals left.  I recommend it.  Most of the flights haven’t had a First, but this is the long leg back from Hong Kong to London.  It’s a lovely feeling when the boarding gate machine spits out your boarding card and they write in a new seat number – when that happens it is invariably good news.

Just have the warm fluffy that you’re getting one of the most special feelings in International Travel, the involuntary upgrade.  It’s really nice, especially if you are travelling with colleagues, or your boss, and it happens to you and not them…

Flying and, in particular, getting upgraded is an imprecise art.  There are some suggestions I have for the new traveller which are worth noting.

I’m a One World alliance frequent flyer, I have a Gold Card, not quite the highest level, but still bloody hard to earn and keep.  I’ve worked damn hard for the thing over 3 years and they do make it hard.  In that time I’ve had an opportunity to look at many airlines and sit in a huge number of seats.

Try to travel in “Premium Economy” – it’s a new class being introduced by most of the long haul carriers.  There is a premium over Economy – but it’s not generally a huge amount.  You can get BA to Seattle in Premium Economy for £600 if you look hard and book in advance.  It’s more than an economy seat, but for an extra 8 inches of leg room and a wider seat, I’ve even paid for it myself.  The thing about Premium Economy, and this is a dirty secret, you are at the top of the upgrade queue.  Plus you generally will gain the miles or points needed for your premium frequent flyer cards faster.

Here’s some more hints:

• Know somebody in the airline.  It works
• Dress for upgrades.  You don’t need an Armani suit, but dress smart casual – which, these days, means the IT industry standby of Chinos and a shirt.
• Ask: It’s worth it – doesn’t necessarily work, but some of the guys who work for me have been upgraded just for asking for it
• Internal US flights ask about paying for upgrades.  Alaskan Airlines, for example, sell upgrades to First for $50 if they have seats spare.  I got an upgrade to BA Business Class Long Haul for £120 once
• If you are a Frequent Flyer, it can pay to complain.  Always to the ground staff – be nice to the crew, they can be handy
• Hold more than one frequent flyer card.  There are several key alliances, only have one for each of the main ones.  Make damn sure your flights are logged, getting them credited after the fact is a pain in the arse

Well, it would appear my Caviar and Champagne are here.  Time to slip into the Pyjamas they’ve given me and watch some movies. 

Toodle pip!